ZOMG

by Nat Budin

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1.
ZOMG 02:45
When I met you, I felt like such a n00b I didn’t understand the way you talk You told me to DM you and I said “what do you mean?” You said “LMGTFY, MuckRock!” You linked me to a page on a web site With a document I read all the way through Eighty-three whole pages filled with tiny acronyms And now this is what I have to say to you: OMG, (oh my god) YMMS (you make me smile) XTC, XO XO ZOMG, (zoh my god), IRLY (I really like you) GTG; TTYL! YATB, IMHO. It’s harder to express yourself on Twitter You have to keep your messages so short So we abbreviate them, but in order to translate them, You’re gonna need this FBI report It was helpfully obtained by a reporter With a Freedom of Information Act request Now instead of “hi, good morning!” I can tell you HGM And this is how I tell you you’re the best: HAY, (how are you?) ITILU (I think I love you) XTC, XO XO OMZ, (oh my Zeus) IPN (I’m posting naked) GTG; TTYL! YATB, IMHO. IITYWTMWYKM? (if I tell you what this means, will you kiss me?) Or maybe you’ll just tell me IIB (ignorance is bliss) It’s hard to do a Twitter LDR (long-distance relationship) And the TTF in this PDF is so damn hard to read I went to go RT you in the morning, But I found that you had linked to your FB Where I saw you less than threeing with your IRL BF Well, I think that I had really BBG GBML, (goodbye my love) ICBI (I can’t believe it) LUA (love you always), LGO (life goes on) FML, (fuck my life) IHA (I hate acronyms) L8R, TTFN, FOAD, GTFO.
2.
When I came to Bellingham, it felt like a constant battle To learn this city’s unfamiliar ways My friends back home would ask me how was it in Seattle And after I corrected them, I’d say Although I don’t quite fit in, I find that I’m quite smitten I’m not quittin’, I’m admittin’ it today… I don’t run enough, I don’t hike enough, I don’t like riding a bike enough They don’t care, they accept me anyway I’m not cool enough, I’m not cute enough, I don’t appreciate fruit enough But I’m a Hamster for a year and that’s okay The corner of West North Street and Northwest Avenue They tell me Boston’s hard to get around in Just get into your car and head in any old direction Before long you’ll be driving up a mountain I’m in constant locomotion, I’ve got a simple notion And the ocean’s magic potion’s in my brain… I’m not green enough, I’m not chill enough, I don’t like walking uphill enough I’m a liberal but not in the right way I’m not thin enough, I’m not queer enough, I don’t like drinking craft beer enough But I’m a Hamster for a year and that’s ok When I came to Bellingham, I had some expectations I steeled myself for months of constant rain But everything’s so beautiful I’d come here on vacation Make a side trip to Vancouver once again The prospect is intriguin’, I might become a vegan Walk a league without fatigue and never stray… I’m not hip enough or type B enough, I don’t like using PCs enough I don’t even know how roller derby’s played I don’t laugh enough, I don’t smile enough, I don’t even like Ryan Stiles enough But I’m a Hamster for a year and that’s, no matter how I might appear, it’s just I’m not weird enough, I’m not slow enough, I’m not pissed about GMOs enough I sometimes eat fast food on Samish Way I’m not punk enough, I’m not hot enough, and I don't vaporize pot enough But I’m a Hamster for a year, I’ll even try the beer I’m a Hamster for a year and that’s ok

about

Two songs I wrote while spending a year in Bellingham, WA.

credits

released January 2, 2015

Nat Budin - guitar, lead vocals, synth programming
Viktoriya Fuzaylova - translation, background vocals

Cover photo by Josh Parrish via Wikimedia Commons.

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about

Nat Budin Mill Creek, Washington

Nat Budin is a singer, songwriter, and producer in the Seattle area, making heartfelt comedy pop and folk music. He's also been a member of the bands Stranger Ways, The Crisis Center, and Klezmoratorium.

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